


Turned Into Oh No What Have I Done

by Zetal (Rodinia)



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Canon Divergence, M/M, Mysterious Ring, That Yuuri is Retroactively Perfectly Okay With, Things Went a Little Different After the Banquet, dubcon for drunk sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-03
Updated: 2019-01-23
Packaged: 2019-06-01 16:47:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15147521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rodinia/pseuds/Zetal
Summary: Yuuri is exhausted and demoralized after the Grand Prix Finals of Tears, but some unexpected news from Phichit and Celestino drags him out of his funk.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LadyShadowphyre](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyShadowphyre/gifts).



> 1\. Accidentally Married  
> 2\. Anger Born of Worry

The last thing Yuuri needed when he stepped off the plane was Phichit shrieking at him. “HAVE YOU SEEN THIS? VIKTOR NIKIFOROV WITHDREW FROM RUSSIA’S NATIONALS!” He shoved his phone in Yuuri’s face, and Yuuri pushed it away. “Yuuri? What’s wrong?”

“Everything.” Yuuri let the tears flow. “Everything’s ruined, Phichit. I screwed up, so bad, and there’s no coming back from this.”

“Uh-oh. This is more than just a bad skate.” Phichit shot a look at Celestino for help.

“It is. Come on, I’ll drop you boys off at home, so you can talk without having to worry about reporters.” Celestino led them to the car he’d left in airport parking.

As soon as they were in the car, Phichit had his arms around Yuuri, letting the older skater cry on his shoulder. “What happened, Yuuri?”

“You saw the skate. That was bad enough. Um, Vicchan… Vicchan died, and Mari called to tell me about it. Not only did I completely blow my chance to talk to Viktor, to meet him as an equal… he didn’t even recognize me when he caught me staring at him after the free skate. He thought I was some random fan. We’d just competed against each other, my performance was not forgettable… and he didn’t even recognize me.”

Phichit looked to Celestino, who nodded, but said, “I’m not so sure he didn’t recognize you, Yuuri. I think he just had no idea what to say, so he said the first thing that came to his mind.”

“Maybe, but…” Yuuri wiped away his tears.

Phichit grabbed his hand. “Oh my god, what’s with this ring, Yuuri?”

Yuuri looked at his right hand. There was a plain gold band he didn’t recognize. He hadn’t even noticed the ring until Phichit mentioned it, but… he vaguely remembered taking it off to go through security at the airport, now, but that’s it. “I don’t know. It looks like a wedding ring, but wrong hand, isn’t it?”

“Depends who you married,” Celestino said. “There are a lot of places in Europe where they wear their rings on their right hands. I think Russia does, so it could just be that you got married in Russia. If that’s a wedding ring, of course, but I wouldn’t rule it out because of the hand.”

Phichit clapped a hand to his mouth. “What if you married Viktor?”

Yuuri flinched at the twist of the knife in his broken dreams. “Don’t be ridiculous, Phichit, why would Viktor marry someone like me?”

“I don’t know, but Viktor dropped out of Russian nationals. When asked, all he would say is family reasons.”

“Viktor doesn’t have any living family,” Yuuri said.

“He does if he got married. Yakov Feltsman confirmed that it’s not a physical injury, but said that he thinks there’s something wrong with Viktor’s brain – not a mental illness or anything, just that Viktor’s being an idiot and there’s no reason for him not to skate. So if he got married and then his husband ran off without even saying goodbye or where he was going…” Phichit squeezed Yuuri’s hand as Yuuri started to freak the fuck out. “Yuuri, I was mostly joking before, but… what if you married Viktor?”

“It would explain why he was asking me for your phone number before the flight…” Celestino said. “I wouldn’t give it to him without your permission, but he gave me his to give you. I thought maybe he just wanted to apologize for his thoughtlessness after the free skate, but maybe it was more than that.” He pulled his phone out and tossed it back to Phichit. “It really is Viktor’s number, and he said not to worry about time zones, just call when you could.”

Phichit caught the phone and pressed it into Yuuri’s hand. “I’m right here for you, Yuuri. You can do this. Call Viktor, ask him what he wants, and believe him when he says he wants to know what’s going on with his husband.”

Yuuri’s thumbs shook as he scrolled to the contact and copied the number into his phone. The call went to voicemail, which he took as a sign that Viktor had forgotten about it. “Um, h-hi, this is Katsuki Yuuri. You asked my coach to have me call you, so…. You can call me back at this number.” He recited his phone number, just in case, and then hung up. “Voice mail.”

“Well, that’s okay,” Phichit said. “Maybe he’s asleep, or on the toilet, or Coach Feltsman’s trying to talk him into un-dropping out of Nationals.”

Yuuri almost smiled at that, but then his phone rang. Viktor. “H-hello?”

“Yuuri? I’m so sorry, I was looking for a Japanese phone number, not an American one, but you’ve been training in America for so long that it makes sense for you to have an American phone! I’m glad you called, maybe you can help me convince my coach I haven’t lost my mind for real this time.”

“Um…” Yuuri looked at Phichit for help. Phichit just shook his head. “Viktor, I… I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’m sorry. What happened?”

“You… don’t remember? Any of it?” Yuuri’s heart plummeted as Viktor started swearing in Russian at himself. “You are remarkably coordinated when you’re blackout drunk. I had no idea you were that bad off. I’m so sorry.”

“What happened, Viktor? Why are you dropping out of Nationals?”

“So I can come to yours! There’s a good chance Russia will still appoint me to the Europeans and Worlds teams, but if they don’t, it gets someone else a chance at winning gold and I don’t have to go through the motions of caring about another competition. Now that I know just how drunk you were, I don’t know that you meant it seriously when you asked me to coach you, but that sounds…”

“I _WHAT_?”

“Right, you don’t remember. You asked me to coach you. Although now that I think about it… you asked me to come to Japan, but aren’t you in America?”

“I…” Yuuri glanced up front. This wasn’t going to be news to Celestino, but still, this didn’t seem like the way for Celestino to hear what was going on in his head even if he’d guessed. “It’s kind of complicated. I’m seriously considering retiring, after that skate.”

“Don’t you dare. You can’t go out on that performance!”

“I’m not going to make any kind of decision until after Nationals. If I retire, I’ll be going home to Hasetsu. If I keep skating… I don’t know.” As expected, Celestino didn’t look at all surprised that Yuuri was considering a coaching change. Phichit, on the other hand, stared at Yuuri, eyes wide with betrayal and shock. “Viktor, this might be a weird question, but I’m wearing a ring I don’t remember having…”

“Well, obviously, it’s not really a wedding ring. Sochi isn’t Vegas, you can’t get married without prior planning, but you did say that you wished it could be, and... we celebrated as if it was. I'm sorry. I didn't realize..."

"It's okay, I would have... okay, I probably would have run away before you could ask, but if I didn't I'd have agreed anyway," Yuuri said, heart racing as he tried to process that. "Where did we get the rings? I assume you have one, too?"

"You bought them, after making me promise it would be a better investment than the Grand Prix Finals turned out to be for you, and mine is identical to yours. I don’t know if you’ve looked at the inside, but they each bear half a snowflake.”

Yuuri took off the ring and looked at the inside, and sure enough, there was the half-snowflake. Okay. So he’d drunkenly not-married Viktor, slept with him, and asked him to be his coach and then forgotten all about it. This was fine. “Okay. That’s… good to know. What happens now?”

“When I assumed you’d remembered, I figured I’d double-check which country I was supposed to be coming to and then go. Now… I don’t know. I’ll be in Japan for your Nationals, no matter what, but do you want me to come out to America first? Since I suddenly have much more time to prepare for my next competition, whenever that is, I don’t mind. I’ll even bring Makkachin! You said you wanted to meet her.”

“Um. Yes. That sounds good. And we can talk about things then? I’m kind of… I don’t know that I can process anything right now.”

“All right! I’ll text you when I have my travel arrangements made. Detroit, right?”

“Yes. Detroit.” Yuuri hung up and stared at his phone.

Phichit took Celestino’s phone from him and passed it back up to the front. “Yuuri? What’s this about you retiring or moving back to Japan?”

“Well, uh… I’m sorry, Coach, this isn’t how I meant to start talking to you about it, but…”

Celestino waved him off. “I wasn’t going to until after Nationals, but I was going to talk to you about this. You need something that I can’t figure out to get you, so if you don’t feel like I’m the right coach for you, I’ll give you whatever advice or recommendations you need to find who the right person is. It’s not just the meltdown at the Finals, this has been building for a while now, and I’m not offended.” He met Yuuri’s eyes in the rearview mirror. “I would hate to see you retire, Yuuri. You’re too good and there’s still so much potential in you, if you can just find the right coach to bring that out.”

“Thanks. Um, you probably won’t like this, but apparently I asked Viktor to be my coach? And he’s taking that seriously?”

“Wait, _Viktor’s_ retiring?!” Phichit shrieked.

“Maybe? It sounds like he doesn’t know what he wants to do either. Sorry to disappoint you, Phichit, but we’re not married. Just kind of… fake-married?”

Phichit glared at Celestino’s head. “What the hell did you let Yuuri do, Coach? I swear, I should drag the both of you to an AA meeting.”

“Right, because you’re such a bastion of responsibility when you drink, Phichit,” Celestino said. “I saw Yuuri hanging out with Christophe – quite a bit more literally than I’d ever expected to see – and decided to get out of there, trusting Christophe to look after Yuuri. Normally, I can.”

“What’s that mean, more literally…?” Phichit probed.

“I don’t know how, and I don’t want to know, but somehow Christophe got a pole set up, and you two were dancing together on it. Yes, Phichit, I took a picture for you before I left.”

Phichit squealed and grabbed Celestino’s phone back, digging through the pictures. “Oh my god! Yuuri! That’s so dirty!”

Yuuri glanced at the phone. Aside from his lack of clothing other than underwear, it wasn’t that bad, and he could see why Viktor wouldn’t think he was significantly impaired. “You’ll have the chance to see more, I expect. Viktor’s coming out to Detroit, and he probably has pictures, too.”

"He's coming out here?" Celestino said. "When he gets here, I want to talk to him."

"Coach, he..."

"No, this isn't a bad thing, I just want to make sure he has some idea how to even be a coach. I don't want your career screwed up because your coach doesn't know how to make sure paperwork gets filed for you to compete at Four Continents, or something like that." Celestino glanced in the mirror again. "Not something I would have ever thought of, but if he's willing to put forth a serious effort to help you, maybe it will be good for you. Just having him believe in you enough to take a break from his own career has to be a huge shot of confidence."

"Maybe. I hadn't... I hadn't thought of it at all, really. I need to sleep for about a week. I know, I can't, I have Nationals and surely it won't take Viktor an entire week to get here, but you know what I mean."


	2. Chapter 2

Yuuri had a very bad feeling about this trip to the airport. For days now, he’d been expecting to hear that the last week had been one big joke or bizarre dream and he was going to wake up to find out that Vicchan was alive, he hadn’t skated the Grand Prix Finals yet, and Viktor Nikiforov was not on his way to Detroit to talk to Yuuri about becoming his coach and husband. He was going to the airport to pick Viktor up, so if this wasn’t real, now would be the time for him to wake up back in Sochi with Celestino worried about him because he’s late for practice.

He didn’t wake up. Viktor came out of security and walked straight over to Yuuri for a hug. “I missed you!”

Yuuri didn’t know what to say. Viktor remembered a great night together in Sochi, but he didn’t. He was taking Viktor’s word about what happened between them – backed up by photos and video and the ring he didn’t remember buying. Saying he missed Viktor would be a lie, but he couldn’t say that, either. Eventually, he went with, “I’m glad you’re here.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t bring Makkachin! The paperwork is such a nuisance.”

“That’s all right, I’m not sure how well I would have handled meeting her right now. I don’t know if I told you about my dog, but Vicchan was a miniature poodle who looked a lot like Makkachin.”

“You did tell me, and showed me pictures. I hadn’t thought about Makkachin possibly being more grief than comfort to you right now. By April, it should be better, right?”

“I hope so.” Yuuri took one of Viktor’s bags from him. “Celestino wants to talk to you as soon as possible, but if you’d rather just go straight to your hotel so you can rest or whatever, he understands.”

“Let’s go to the hotel so I can drop these bags off and unpack. Why does Celestino want to talk to me? You did talk to him about looking at a coaching change, didn’t you?”

“Yes, of course. That’s why he wants to talk to you, to make sure you know what you’re doing.”

 

Helping Viktor unpack was a surreal experience. Yuuri could not believe that Viktor was in Detroit, that Yuuri was in his hotel room, that he was handling Viktor’s clothes with Viktor’s permission. While unpacking, Yuuri noticed that Viktor still had his ring on. “You’re still wearing that, even knowing I completely forgot about it?”

“Yes.” Viktor looked pointedly at Yuuri’s right hand. “So are you, I notice.”

Yuuri looked at it as well. It was easier than looking at Viktor. “I don’t remember Sochi. As long as I’m wearing the ring, I have a physical reminder that it happened. There’s no way I could have talked myself out of meeting you at the airport because I had a weird hangover dream and you weren’t really coming.”

Viktor took Yuuri’s hand. “For me, it’s a reminder that I have a chance at having something real outside of skating in my life. I know you don’t remember, and as I’ve been reminded by many people since Sochi, things people do or say when they’re drunk can’t be trusted, but I’m having trouble believing those feelings came out of nowhere. I’m not here with the expectation of these rings coming true right away, but at least there’s a chance that we’ll get there. It’s more hope for life after skating than I’ve felt in a long time. Possibly ever, when I was young I was always happy to let that be a problem for the future and just didn’t think about it.”

“Are you thinking of retiring?” It wasn’t exactly the most important thing to address, but it was easier than getting his mind around Viktor wanting this to work so badly.

Viktor nodded. “I’m going to be twenty-seven in a couple weeks. I’m at the peak of my career now, five straight Grand Prix Finals golds, four times straight world champion, breaking my own records several times, and I know I have a lot of fans out there who are eager to see how long I can keep this going. I know it won’t be forever, and I never wanted to watch skaters I admired stay too long, risking injuries that they can’t bounce back from the way younger skaters can, not keeping up as skating moves forward, and former champions are having to fight just to make free skates or get selected to the Grand Prix. I don’t want to be that champion clinging to faded glory, but if I retired, what would I do? I never thought about coaching, I know I couldn’t teach…”

“Why not?” Yuuri interrupted. “You’re such a good skater…”

“Exactly! I couldn’t teach the basics, the fundamentals, because those all came so easily to me. I can teach you to do a quad, because I had to work at those, and I could teach someone to do a triple or a double because it’s a similar process. More power, more critical timing. I don’t think I could teach someone to do a single flip.” Yuuri hadn’t thought of that. He’d had to work so hard for everything he learned that teaching it wouldn’t be a problem. “You’d be different. You already know how to skate, you just need to find the confidence to do what you know you can. Landing that quad salchow would certainly help, of course, but I think I can help you with that.”

“And you… you really want these rings to come true? You barely know me and half of what you do know is only true when I’m drunk.”

“I really want these rings to come true. If they don’t, if this doesn’t work out, at least it’s helped me remember how to feel.” It was Viktor’s turn to stare at his ring instead of making eye contact with Yuuri. “I’m a good enough actor that it’s never showed in my skating, at least not that anyone’s said something to me about, but the last couple years, everything’s been… grey. Get up in the morning, go to practice, do whatever publicity or sponsorship stuff is scheduled for that day, and then… I try to lose myself in choreography, in planning routines, in trying to reinvent myself yet again for the next season, but it’s getting harder and harder. I’m not sure I have it in me unless something drastic changes.” Viktor broke into a smile that made Yuuri feel dizzy from the brightness. “In a way, it already has! I couldn’t put this into words in Sochi!”


End file.
